Thou Shalt Not Be Stupid

       It’s never too early to start thinking about what you would like to see in the next contract. Too often we focus on the money and the benefits and ignore the opportunity to make some changes in the language. We’ve done well with this strategy, the money is good and that goes a long way toward smoothing over some obvious problems with the language. One glaring mistake that we’ve made for too many years though is that we have not added a clause that says the company does not have the right to be stupid. 
      When I was a Steward, every day I had people come up to me and say things like:
     “They are sending me out today on a route blind. Somebody else who knows the route is doing the route I know. How can they be that stupid?”
     Or, “I’ve got an 8-hour today and more stops then I had yesterday. Do they really think that’s going to work?”
     Or, “They wrote me up for a mis-delivery and I was on vacation that week. Are they stupid or what?” 
     My response was always the same. “There is nothing in the contract that says they can’t be stupid!” 
     Article 11 of the Master Agreement is not being used right now. It’s listed now as “Reserved”. I think this may be what they reserved it for. I think the language would be simple enough to write. “The company agrees to pay one hour at the overtime rate to anyone to whom they do something that is deemed to be really stupid.” Then the monetary penalties would increase if the stupidity continues. 
     It’s never to early start making a list of what you want to see in the next contract.
Let’s start with Article 11.


Our stewards received the Telematics training yesterday. There were no real surprises in what the system shows. For those of you that don’t know, the system has a series of pages, each with a specific event flagged. Say they want to check seatbelt use, they can pull up the seatbelt page, and every time you moved without putting on the seatbelt a flag goes up at the stop. Each flag shows not only the fact that you didn’t put on the seatbelt, but also shows how far you went before you put the seatbelt on, and what address you were at when you failed to use the seatbelt. The map will also show a red line along the route you took for as far as the seatbelt was not on. For the backing screen the flag shows where you backed first, and how far. You're Supervisor Controlling Your LifeThey also number the order of the violations. On the side it will give the total distance backed, the total number of violations, etc. The most interesting screen was the lunch hour screen. The lunch hour screen shows the last stop you made, how far you traveled, and how long you sat there. Telematics combines with the DIAD to also keep track of when you record packages while moving. The example we saw had and incredible amount of stops sheeted while driving. I couldn’t even do that and keep the truck on the road. Of course that is a very dangerous practice.
Gettin'Down With Big Brown!So in case any of you had any doubts, u-Robot. You have definitely entered a new era in delivering for UPS. My predictions for the future are as follows. First the system is going to cost the company a fortune in production. The good part of that will be, if you are a guy that is getting beat up because of a bad time study, or some other fiasco on your area, we simply will redirect them to Telematics. The bad part is, if you are a sit on your ass kind of driver, then run, jump, and fly to get it done, you have a problem. They will see you sitting on your ass, and they will see you exceeding the speed limit, having your bulkhead door open, not wearing your seatbelt, etc., in order to get done on time. There will be no reason to try to make up time. If you get behind, too bad. Remember one thing as they implement this system across the country. It falls into the category of too much information. If you are a 2 hour over driver, you will hear about what you are doing on your area, but if it’s the time study’s fault, they will have no excuses, and will have to stop harassing you. The rest of you will simply have to conform to their safety expectations. That’s really not a bad thing when you think about it. Most of you have those good habits anyway. Those of you that do not will end up fired if you don’t learn them, and eventually you will go away. You all can understand what a cost injuries, and accidents are for the company. So you can see the justification in their expenditure. For the company to sell out production in the name of safety, spend the millions it cost to install, implement, train the hourlys, and management people to use the system, you can see how important these issues are to them. For all of us it’s simple, we-Robot. It’s just going to become the way of life at UPS. You can imagine the changes I’ve seen in 30 years. What does the next 30 hold? Guess we’ll see.

Corporatists=Chinese Patriots

Here is more information on how we are systematically being sold to China. In the current recession/depression China continues to strengthen their hold on the financial and manufacturing markets of the world. 

                                                 Read it for Yourself

UPS vs FedEx

         FedEx and UPS recently competed head to head in a rowing race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day the FedEx team won by a mile.
        FedEx wins Afterward, the UPS team became very discouraged and depressed. UPS management decided the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found. A Management Team made up of senior executives was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was the FedEx team had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the UPS team had 8 people steering and one person rowing.
        So UPS management hired a consulting company and paid them vast amounts of money. After six months of hard work, they advised that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing. So the UPS Team acted: To prevent losing to the FedEx team again, the rowing team’s management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering managers, 2 area steering division managers and 1 operations manager.
        The UPS Team also implemented a new performance system that would give the one person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the Demonstrated Rowing Performance Program, with meetings, write-ups and free pens for the rower. Even up front parking and a coffee cup were promised for a winner.
        At the next race, FedEx won by two miles. Humiliated, UPS management fired the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new boat, sold the oars and canceled all capital investments for new equipment.
        The money saved was distributed to the senior executives as bonuses for a job well done.

The UPS Marching Song

     Sing outDid you know that UPS had a marching song? Well..they do. It was written by a couple of UPSers and introduced at a Breakfast Club meeting in May of 1929. It is sung to the tune of the “Caisson Song” (often called “Over Hill, Over Dale”).

  Sing along: 

        “Over hill, over dale, as they hit the concrete trail, our brown wagons go rolling along.
    Shout it out, without doubt, service rides on every route as our wagons go rolling along.
        Then it’s hi hi he in the brown shirt cavalry, shout out our message loud and strong!
    Where’re you go you will always know our brown wagons go rolling along.”

Injuries and Overtime

Is working overtime bad for your health? Researchers at the University of Massachusetts Medical School recently released what is perhaps the largest study to date on the relationship between overtime and workplace injuries, finding that those who work extra hours are 61% more likely to be injured on the job than those who do not. This study covered a wide range of jobs and analyzed data on more than 5,100 work-related injuries and illnesses.
        The researchers believe these findings support the theory that fatigue and stress caused by long working hours indirectly contribute to workplace accidents. This study and many others show that musculoskeletal conditions–most commonly back pain–are the main workplace affliction. The United States is one of only a few industrialized countries that do not have national limits on the amount of time an employee can work.

How Ya Doin’ ?

“The Tightest SLAVE Ship in the Shipping Industry”        One Of, “The Few, The Proud, The Overallowed”        
Just another day in paradise!  
                             Just beatin’ the big brown dead horse!

Just wackin’ big brown!                      Just holdin’ on for dear life!

Just lovin’ life!                    Just driven’ the big brown machine!

Just huggin’ boxes!                                           Just another Monday in Paradise!>>
Gettin’ down with brown!                                                  Just massagin’ cardboard!

Just livin’ the big brown life!                Must be paradise ‘cause I keep comin’ back!

Lovin’ now, hopin’ to leave soon!                 Just happy to be here!
Greeting My Brown GirlfriendHappy to be here, wishin’ I was somewhere else!

Getting’ by till the cows come home!

Just takin’ a big brown!

Hanging out till things get better!

Wishin’ things were better!

Hopin’ for the best, expectin’ the worst!                            Feelin’ the love!

Wackin’ brown after the sun goes down!     Just givin’ other people’s stuff away!

Countin’ visit’s!                      Hope it’s paradise!

Plannin’ my day!                          Beatin’ the big brown noodle!

Hopin’ for sensitivity!                                 Lovin’ the boss!

Just glad they care so much!

Hopin’ for an early day!                                   Just knowin’ things will be better tomorrow!

If you think it’s bad today, just wait!                               Livin’ light!

Headin’ them off at the pass!                                                                  Gettin’ motivated!

Gettin’ brown outa my ass!                         Prayen’ with the big brown god!

Motivatin’ through the day!                                 Wonderin’ about the bosses wacky terbacky!

Believin’ in the universe!                                                      Takin’ the Big Brown Dirt Nap!
Must be Purgatory!         Waggin’ the Big Brown Tail!
Stinkin’ It Up!                                                                     Just Suckin’!
Retirin’ Till I Retire!

Blank stare!
And you?
Gotta favorite greeting? Put it in our comments. We’ll add it to our list!

UPS driver information